The babies learning curve

Last week I signed up for the church nursery. Since the Pollocks are getting older, there hasn't been need, but yesterday a little congregational grandson showed up. He is three months old. If not for the Carson Crash Course, I would not have known what to do with him. Seriously.

I haven't had a real baby around since 1985. She is now married and counting kroner and knitting. I have friends with babies, but traditionally admired the wee ones from afar. Eighteen months to 18 years, that's my crowd.

Probably everyone but me and Abby knows, but:
1. Lactating is the key charm.
2. In the absence of #1, a bottle of formula will do.
3. Contentedness and napping should follow burping.
4. Another reason for unhappiness is a dirty diaper. Change it.
5. I don't know what to do if these don't work.

Carson with one of Brock's wrestlers,a big brother of little sistersnonplussed by distress